Song of the Day : The Who – Magic Bus
Here’s a great idea! Let’s combine one of the most beloved performers of all time with some pedophile chargers. Oh wait, we already did that. Ok then, then let’s try combining the beloved pedophile performer with a children’s theme park! Oh wait, we already did that. Ok then, let’s submerge the pedophile performer’s theme park into a massive online virtual world where indoor-kids and creepy-adults from all around the world can practice dance moves for points!
OH WAIT, WE ALREADY DID THAT.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, finally we can put down our keyboard swords that help us destroy ogres and dragons. These worlds of “warcraft” have desensitized us to violence! I don’t know about you, but I can’t keep track of how many hours I’ve clocked in razing villages to raise my experience points. And for what! Every time I explore a mission, some 12-year-old pissant casts a +32 Fire Spell and – poof! – Game Over.
Alright, so I really haven’t really played World of Warcraft. Consider me part of the internet-wielding minority, for 11.5 million users signed-on to the Massive Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game this past year. Now with the inclusion avatars and virtual worlds like Second Life and Farmville to our internet hours, the market for online internet play-places is thriving- so why not create the Michael Jackson virtual world, Planet Michael?
For one, it’s creepy. As an adult, I don’t feel comfortable exploring Neverland Ranch, even if it is virtual. Who knows if that 18-year-old girl is actually a 40-year-old pervert. To add to the queer-factor, the object of the game is to focus on Jackson’s dance moves and adhere to his credo of nonviolence. Nothing terrible, but that kick-move MJ does only works on the dance floor, not on Planet Kilitall, kiddo. In Planet Michael, fans will be able to collect and trade virtual Jackson merchandise (+62 Studded Glove, +99 Zombie Track Suit, etc), and earn credits by performing challenges related to his music and dance moves. As if the moonwalk wasn’t hard enough in real life…
Jackson’s not the only one using the online gaming world for work instead of play. Last year, hip-hop artist Jay-Z licensed his Rocawear clothing line to the WeeWorld virtual game targeted at teenagers.
Somehow, through it all, I still don’t understand the draw of games like these. Maybe I’m a purist. I don’t know how I feel about bringing together the world of Michael Jackson’s music and the video game universe, because in my mind they have already achieved perfect. 1990 Sega Genesis classic “Moonwalker”, you will always be the only one for me.
[Inspired by Billboard]